Introduction

We all had one or two things we picked up during quarantine in 2020. For some, it was making sourdough bread or knitting hats or learning to draw. My thing was skincare. My obsession with skincare probably came about because of my acne. I have struggled with acne for years, and the stress from COVID-19 was not helping my skin at all. It was always something that I was aware of. I did not understand why other girls could have perfectly clear skin while I had a new pimple every week. And when I don’t understand something, I research the hell out of it. In between online classes and spraying down our Amazon packages with Lysol, I would be on my school issues computer researching. I would spend hours researching ingredients, watching reviews of different skin care companies, and even trying out products that piqued my interest. Through all this research, I learned so much more than just skin types and what active ingredients to use to help get rid of acne scars. I learned a lot about life. Today, I want to share with you some of the lessons I learned through the three products that I utilize in my skincare routine.

Cleanser

The first step to any skincare routine is a cleanser. A cleanser does what you think it does; it washes away all the oil, makeup, and dirt that accumulates on your face throughout the day. It is a fresh start; it is washing away the past, much like forgiveness. Forgiveness is challenging. When I was younger, I held a lot of grudges. It was hard to let things go when people hurt me, especially from people I considered friends. Eventually, I learned that forgiveness is as much for you as it is for other people. When someone hurts me, I am not obligated to forgive them, although I believe that it is an important step in moving on. For me, forgiveness is my closure. It is saying that I deserve better. It is saying that I learned an important lesson. It is saying that I will not allow the people who hurt me to continue to take my time, talent, and treasure. I cannot change the past, but I can change my mindset and my emotions around the past. While it is usually something given to others, forgiveness is also a gift to myself. Like cleansing, forgiveness is a part of self-care. Just like how a cleanser clears away impurities, forgiveness clears away a weight on my heart and mind. There is peace in silent forgiveness. I have forgiven so many people who will probably never know because they are no longer an active part of my life. However, just because I forgive you does not give you access to me again. I just washed my face, so why would I go roll around in mud? A cleanser and forgiveness are important first steps to new beginnings.

Retinol

Retinol is one of the first things that dermatologists will usually prescribe for patients struggling with acne because it is an easy and effective way to help decrease breakouts. Its main job is to speed up skin cell turnover by purging the skin of everything causing ance. I use purging here specifically because when you first start retinol, you go through something called the “retinol purge”. This is a temporary reaction that causes all of the acne under the skin to come to the surface, resulting in new breakouts (commonly called “retinol uglies”). Let me tell you from personal experience that the retinol purge is horrible. You could even equate it to a breakup (either friendship or relationship). Both are painful processes that result in shame, pain, and loss. It is difficult to do something that you know is good for you in the long run. Humans crave instant gratification, so experiencing a retinol purge or a friendship/relationship purge goes against our human nature. These two things cause exactly the feelings that we are trying to escape. However, both are important steps in growth and development. After the retinol purge, your skin (slowly but surely) adapts to the retinol. You will notice that your skin is brighter, smoother, and clearer. After the mourning period of a friendship/relationship, you will feel so much better. You learned new things about your boundaries and your deal breakers. You learn the importance of clear communication, honesty, and loyalty. You learn how to keep your heart open to others. Retinol and breakups allow you to shed the past to make way for the future.

Moisturizer

Moisturizer is probably my favorite part of my skincare routine because I feel so good after it. As one might guess from the name, moisturizers hydrate, smooth, and nourish the skin by protecting the outside and going below the surface. This step always makes me feel the most confident. Confidence is a powerful tool. It can be so easy when you have acne-prone skin to feel unconfident, especially as a young girl. I would judge myself before people even had the chance to judge me. I hid behind a literal (face) mask to hide my acne. I would add filters to pictures to hide my acne. While it took me a long time to figure out how to clear my skin, it took me even longer to feel confident in my own skin. My self-love and confidence journey was hard, and it was because I was placing my self-worth on the way that I looked. However, I am so much more than that. I am a loving daughter and sister. I am a loyal friend. I am a dedicated student. I am an avid reader. I am a passionate writer. None of these things have to do with what I look like. During my retinol purging, I tried very hard to not put my life on hold just because I was breaking out. Slowly, my confidence grew, and I learned to love my skin whether or not it was breaking out. Attached to this blog post is a close-up picture of my face because, in the past, I would have never posted it. I was too self-conscious to post a photo like that because I was worried people would see my ance or my acne scars. Today, I continue to have the occasional breakout because no treatment plan is perfect. I try to remind myself that my heart is what makes me beautiful. Moisturizes and confidence both go below the surface.

Conclusion

Life is like a skincare routine. You need to be aware of what you are putting on your face, just like you should be aware of who you are letting into your life. Sometimes, you learn that you don’t like something the hard way, like a friend breaking a promise or a new moisturizer breaking you out. Just like your priorities, wants, and desires, your skincare routine is constantly adapting to your skin’s present needs and wants. Both are all about balance. You have to find a balance between the products that work for you. You have to find a balance between your priorities, desires, needs, and values. There is so much that we can learn from the mundane things in our lives, like washing our face in the morning. I hope this blog post helped show you that.

Also, to anyone out there struggling with acne, I feel your pain. I encourage you to reach out to medical professionals for guidance because my dermatologist was the one who got me the help I needed.